so i am sitting here at 1 am and i can't sleep. again. ... but it's ok. i knew this might happen so it's ok... i'm going to hawaii in the morning and i don't really care. i suppose that's the worst part of this whole thing. the not caring. i know i do care, i just don't....
the other part that sucks about all this is the deep, deep feeling... that ache that you can't get rid of and can't ignore because it's always there and always rearing it's ugly head like a headache that won't go away or a thorn in your foot that you feel every time you take a step, but you can't see so you can't remove it... that's the part i hate the most...
anyways, enough with the stupid rant that no one cares about. here's the thing: i am going away for a week and will be out of touch, and that isn't all that big of a deal. what makes this so significant is that, with what i'm going through, i am and have been feeling really lonely, i suppose... so feel free to call or text or IM me any time, day or night. no joke. i will most likely be awake or in some state of consciousness, so please, if you want to talk, talk. i'm here. and i might just need someone to talk to in order to keep me from going insane... :P
--as always
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